The latest crop of new musical definitions
BANDSTAND: The area furthest away from an electrical outlet.
BIG BAND: Nowadays, an aggregation consisting of two musicians.
BROADWAY PIT JOB: A prison sentence disguised as a gig.
CABARET: A venue where singers do songs from shows that closed out of town.
CARPAL TUNNEL SYNDROME: God's way of telling you that you've practiced too much.
CATERER: A man whose hatred for musicians is unrivaled.
CHANTEUSE: A singer with an accent and no sense of time.
CLASSICAL COMPOSER: A man ahead of his time and behind in the rent.
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